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Where the Hell is Moses Kuria?

It seems Moses Kuria, the man of many portfolios, embarked on a whirlwind adventure through the halls of government, only to find himself in a comedic conundrum. Starting off strong as the Cabinet Secretary for Investments, Trade, and Industry, he was the talk of the town. But alas, fate had other plans. In a twist fit for a sitcom, Kuria found himself shuffled over to the Public Service portfolio faster than you can say "bureaucratic shuffle". Then, the plot thickened! In a classic case of diplomatic drama, the US Trade Representative, Katherine Tai, decided to give Kuria a cold shoulder after cancelling not one, but two meetings with him. The reason? His "foul mouth". Oh, the irony! It seems even the most seasoned politicians can't escape the wrath of a sharp tongue. Since then, Kuria has seemingly vanished into thin air, keeping a low profile that would make even Bigfoot jealous. Rumour has it he's taken up residence in a cozy cave somewhere, pondering th
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Kenya's new Dream Team

We have just received the final list of the Kenya's new-look Cabinet, and I must say here at Siasa Duni we're quite impressed at first glance...

KENYA'S NEW LOOK CABINET - (THE LEAKED VERSION)

1. President - Emillio Mwai wa Kibaki

2. Prime Minister - Eng. Raila Amollo Odinga

3. Vice President - Kalonzo Musyoka

4. Deputy Prime Minister And Minister For Finance -Musalia Mudavadi

5. Deputy Prime Minister And Minister For Internal Security - Kiraitu Murungi

6. Minister For Planning - Amos Kimunya

7. Minister For Justice And Human Rights - James Orengo

8. Minister For Constitutional Affairs - Martha Karua

9. Minister For Roads And Public Works - William Ruto

10. Minister For Co-operative Development - Sam Ongeri

11. Minister For Education for Higher Education - Anyang Nyong'o

12. Minister For Education for Basic Education - John Munyes

13. Minister For Housing - Kabando Wa Kabando

14. Minister For Foreign Affairs - Moses Wetangula

15. Minister For Science And Technology - George Saitoti

16. Minister For Defence - Joseph Nkaisery

17. Minister For Special Programmes - Naomi Shaaban

18. Minister For Local Government - Uhuru Kenyatta

19. Minister For Environment and Natural Resources - Henry Kosgey

20. Minister For Communication, Information And Broadcasting - Joseph Nyagah

21. Minister For Water And Irrigation - Omingo Magara

22. Minister For Livestock - Samuel Poghisio

23. Minister For Trade - Soita Shitanda

24. Minister For Fisheries - Dalmas Otieno

25. Minister For Youth Affairs - Danson Mungatana

26. Minister For Gender Affairs - Mohammed Kuti

27. Minister For Sports - Musa Sirma

28. Minister For Agriculture - Bonny Khalwale

29. Minister For Energy-Mwangi Kiunjuri

30. Minister For Health - Charity Ngilu

31. Minister For Lands-Noah Wekesa

32. Minister For Home Affairs - Chris Okemo

33. Minister For Transport - Chirau Mwakwere

34. Minister For Regional Development - Wilfred Machage

35. Minister For Home Affairs - Najib Balala

36. Minister For Labour - Alfred Khangati

37. Minister For East African Community - Mutula Kilonzo

38. Minister For Public Service - Sally Kosgey

39. Attorney General - Amos Wako

40. Head Of Public Prosecutions - Paul Muite

41. Secretary To The Cabinet And Head Of Civil Service - Prof. Wangari Maathai

Now we all know why Amb. Francis Muthaura was beating his gums last week; he must have got wind of his impending doom, and was exhibiting the kicks of a dying horse. Moving swiftly onwards, this list looks pretty impressive at first glance. But a close look reveals the culprits we would rather do without, chief among them Kiraitu "You can't rape a willing woman" Muringi, Chirau "I was looking for your mother on Koinange Street" Mwakwere and Amos "Smiling" Wako.

We welcome, however, the inclusion of some fresh faces: James Orengo, Mutula Kilonzo, Sally Kosgey and newcomer Alfred Khangati. All in all, I think the job fits the man... in some cases, the woman. Sasa kazi ianze!
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Anonymous said…
i am especially happy 4 Ms Ngilu---she promised that she will be back in Afya House.

Maathai will do a rigorous job.

Sally Kosgey in familiar ground.

How come Home Affairs has 2 Ministers?

All in all good combination. Kazi IANZE.
20 March 2008 at 06:34
Udi said…
how is that a dream team? thats an old boys clique. A country the size of Texas requires 38 ministries. What kind of nonsense is this. Cut it down to 15, 2 from each province. and tell Kenyans that the government positions are not tribal positions but rather national positions. Have the 15 ministries put in the constitution and make it require 2/3 to change it, and let work be performed. Now what is a Minister for Fisheries doing everyday at work? observing fish? and a Minister for Livestock? watching cows? Get a whole Agriculture department and give it to one clown
20 March 2008 at 17:59
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