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Where the Hell is Moses Kuria?

It seems Moses Kuria, the man of many portfolios, embarked on a whirlwind adventure through the halls of government, only to find himself in a comedic conundrum. Starting off strong as the Cabinet Secretary for Investments, Trade, and Industry, he was the talk of the town. But alas, fate had other plans. In a twist fit for a sitcom, Kuria found himself shuffled over to the Public Service portfolio faster than you can say "bureaucratic shuffle". Then, the plot thickened! In a classic case of diplomatic drama, the US Trade Representative, Katherine Tai, decided to give Kuria a cold shoulder after cancelling not one, but two meetings with him. The reason? His "foul mouth". Oh, the irony! It seems even the most seasoned politicians can't escape the wrath of a sharp tongue. Since then, Kuria has seemingly vanished into thin air, keeping a low profile that would make even Bigfoot jealous. Rumour has it he's taken up residence in a cozy cave somewhere, pondering th
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BREAKING NEWS: Internal Security minister names Kenya's Drug Lords

George Saitoti has revealed in Parliament that MPs Gidion Mbuvi, William Kabogo, Hassan Joho and Harun Mwau are among the 6 drug lords under investigation for drug trafficking. We'll keep you posted as details become available.
UPDATE: Juja MP William Kabogo (snitch?) tabled documents claiming they contained the names of Simon Mbugua (Kamukunji) and Eugene Wamalwa (Saboti), also believed to be in the dossier in Prof. Saitoti's possession. He added that a wife of a prominent Kenyan was also on the list. Mr Kabogo was categorical that the list he tabled was from the American Embassy. The MPs in the list defended themselves with Mr Kabogo and Mr Joho insisting that those who had mentioned them should also be investigated for "peddling falsehoods". They said they welcomed thorough investigations. Mr Joho demanded unsuccessfully that his name be expunged from the list until investigations are concluded, stating that it was scandalous and meant "to kill others politically". He demanded that the minister undertakes that if he is found innocent, those who named be made to face the full force of the law. 
Meanwhile, we're reliably informed that Sonko is Mwau's illegitimate son and Kabogo is his son-in-law! Can anyone confirm?
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