Skip to main content

Featured

Where the Hell is Moses Kuria?

It seems Moses Kuria, the man of many portfolios, embarked on a whirlwind adventure through the halls of government, only to find himself in a comedic conundrum. Starting off strong as the Cabinet Secretary for Investments, Trade, and Industry, he was the talk of the town. But alas, fate had other plans. In a twist fit for a sitcom, Kuria found himself shuffled over to the Public Service portfolio faster than you can say "bureaucratic shuffle". Then, the plot thickened! In a classic case of diplomatic drama, the US Trade Representative, Katherine Tai, decided to give Kuria a cold shoulder after cancelling not one, but two meetings with him. The reason? His "foul mouth". Oh, the irony! It seems even the most seasoned politicians can't escape the wrath of a sharp tongue. Since then, Kuria has seemingly vanished into thin air, keeping a low profile that would make even Bigfoot jealous. Rumour has it he's taken up residence in a cozy cave somewhere, pondering th

After John Waluke’s Shocking Judgement, What Next For Jubilee Asili?

Jubilee Asili aka Tanga Tanga is just about to take a devastating body blow. And it has nothing to do with the Ksh. 112 million unaccounted for in Sirisia MP John Waluke’s two-day spending spree which, many observers believe, was paid out to Deputy President William Ruto. Other beneficiaries are:
  • Former Deputy Chief Justice Nancy Barasa was the first beneficiary, receiving Ksh. 5 million as legal fees.
  • On the same day, Ahmednasir Abdikadir & Co. Advocates, in two separate transactions, received a total sum of Ksh. 40 million detailed as legal fees in a transaction from a National Cereals and Produce Board (NCPB) account at the National Bank of Kenya to First Community Bank where Ahmednasir Abdikadir & Co. Advocates holds an account. Ahmednasir Abdikadir & Co. Advocates also received money from NCPB’s dollar account at Cooperative Bank and the entire windfall of millions was withdrawn in cash.
  • Still on the same day, three cheque withdrawals amounting to Ksh. 16 million were transacted but the beneficiaries are not stated.
  • On the 21st of March 2013, Grace Wakhungu, Waluke’s accomplice, received a staggering Ksh. 40 million from Soita & Saende Advocates.
  • Ksh. 50 million in fictitious payments were wired to John Koyi Waluke who Ethics and Anti-Corruption Commission (EACC) says was the mastermind of the money heist in Nairobi.
  • Ksh. 112 million ended up with an individual who has not been identified.
For his labours, Waluke lost his Parliamentary seat on top of being ordered to pay an eye-watering Ksh. 1 billion or face 67 years in jail. In a sentence that effectively ends his political career, Anti-Corruption Court Chief Magistrate Elizabeth Juma ordered that her verdict be handed to National Assembly Speaker Justin Muturi who will in turn declare the Sirisia Parliamentary seat vacant. Waluke will pay Ksh. 726 million for his role in the theft, as well as shoulder the burden of Ksh. 313 million, more than half the amount the court fined Erad Supplies & General Contractors Ltd. where Waluke and his co-accused, Grace Sarapay Wakhungu—sister to former Vice President Moody Awori and mother of Prof. Judi Wakhungu, former Cabinet Secretary for Environment, Water & Natural Resources and currently Kenya’s ambassador to France/Portugal/Serbia/Monaco/Holy See (also, Oceans Award 2018, Clark Bavin Award 2016)—were directors. Wakhungu was slapped with a 707 fine of her own, of which she had already rustled up a whopping Ksh. 588 million just one day after sentencing. Waluke was found guilty of three counts of obtaining money through false pretences while Wakhungu was convicted on five counts including a charge of perjury.

In her sentencing, the Chief Magistrate observed that Waluke and Wakhungu took advantage of hungry Kenyans to mint money. “The offenses are serious and the accused persons took advantage out of a dire situation where Kenyans were faced with hunger and maize was required to save Kenyans from starvation. It therefore calls for a deterrence sentence,” she said. The court also paved the way for NCPB to go after the two convicts’ assets to recover the Ksh. 297 million it had lost.

Opining on the historic ruling, prominent city lawyer and socialite Donald Kipkorir Tweeted, “This Anti-Corruption Court has set a precedent for our Courts ... John Waluke & Grace Wakhungu have each been fined Kshs. 594,000,000/= ... Even the Hustler Nation aka TangaTanga aka Jubilee Asili aka TSP will abandon their Member to rot in jail ... #WalukeSentencing
Waluke has been one of the more vocal firebrands of Deputy President William Ruto’s Tanga Tanga faction of the ruling party recently christened Jubilee Asili, where the axe has been landing, constantly, of late. After chairing the Jubilee Parliamentary Group meeting on Monday 22nd June during which National Assembly Majority Leader and key Ruto ally Aden Duale was dramatically booted in the 20-minute meeting whose only agenda seems to have been exactly that, Uhuru Kenyatta promised us that more changes were still to come. This wholesale purge of Ruto functionaries from Parliament started with the toppling of Senate leaders Kithure Kindiki (Deputy Speaker), Kipchumba Murkomen (Majority Leader) and Majority Whip Susan Kihika. Then came the ejection of National Assembly Majority Whip Ben Washiali and his deputy Cecily Mbarire, and the removal from Parliamentary Committees of a scandalous 21 MPs. All these happened without Ruto uttering a word.

Responding to the ouster of his latest lieutenant, Ruto tweeted, “My brother Aden Duale, you are a great leader. For the last eight years, you discharged your responsibilities as our party’s first Majority Leader with style, precision, passion and loyalty,” about the Garissa Township MP who became Majority Leader in 2013. “When Parliamentary history is written, you will have a chapter. Mbele iko sawa na Mungu,” he added.

Now remember that devastating body blow we talked about? This is where it enters the story. The next logical step, then, is for Uhuru to squeeze the remaining life force out of Tanga Tanga cum Jubilee Asili. And the opportunity presents itself in the form of the unresolved Kimwerer and Arror Dams scandal. How perfectly convenient is it that Ruto and nearly all his factotums (and dredges and noisemakers and rubble rousers) are expediently implicated in this grand theft? Like the Brave Little Tailor in The Brothers Grimm’s fairy tale, Uhuru can now put them down Seven at One Blow. So, going forward, expect the Kimwerer and Arror affair to find itself fast-tracked into Anti-Corruption court in the coming weeks. Expect also Jubilee Asili to suffer a massive body count on account of prosecution of that case. A precedent has already been set with the shocking Waluke judgement.

Uhuru is clearly learning Politics 101 at the feet of his brother Raila Odinga. The one, you know, who famously put Moi, the self-styled Professor of Politics, to pasture.

Comments

Popular Posts